No. 10: The coincidence of Labour Day Weekend is not lost on us.

When: Saturday, September 5, 2009
Where: St Michael's Hospital
Who: Baby Girl Fleming
What: Getting a head start (hopefully the first of many)

Why: Because my Impaired Glucose Tolerance in Pregnancy has me on five units of Humalog before dinner, my OB is playing it safe and inducing me a week early, unless I deliver without his help before Saturday. THIS IS CRAZY.

I mean, I know the baby is healthy and ready and might very well have arrived on her own before my technical due date of September 12, and I certainly don't mean that my OB is a nutbar for inducing me so soon. (In fact, my OB is awesome.) It's just -- and perhaps this is the crazy part -- I was pretty much counting on at least ten more days before delivery. This may be a sign that I'm not quite prepared to be a parent. But is anyone ever prepared?

So, yeah, no chance of the baby being born on 9.9.9. I think we all knew that was a pipe dream, no? I just can't believe the baby will be out and about in a matter of days. Wow.


See also:
St Michael's Hospital
Baby Girl Fleming
Impaired Glucose Tolerance in Pregnancy
Humalog
my OB

No. 9: Stuff! Stuff! More Stuff for Us!

When: Whenever!
Where: Online or in-store
Who: Relatives and curious friends
What: Indulging the Flemings

Why: After a few inquiries from loved ones, we decided that we would look into a baby registry...or two...or three...or four. Oh, did we mention we signed up for a diaper service? No? How about our love for Joe Fresh Kids? Sigh.

Going public with a registry is a bit embarrassing as it feels like begging. On the other hand, the help is greatly appreciated. So if you asked, or were going to ask, the links are below...and we thank you very much.


See also:
one (The Hudson's Bay Company; Last Name FLEMING, First Name PATRICK, Event Type BABY)
two (Sears; Enter Registry Number 200912602284)
three (Babies "R" Us; Registry #43556036)
four (Pottery Barn; registry available in-store only)
diaper service
Joe Fresh Kids

No. 8: Baby's Choice!

When: May 21, 2009 [left] and May 26, 2009 [right]
Where: The living room [left] and Metro Central Ultrasound [right]
Who: Me and the kid
What: Measuring up (me, 31 pounds gained and counting; the kid, now approximately one pound, four ounces)

Why: Another ultrasound, another post. Why not? Sure, the kid doesn't appear to have changed much since her previous portrait, but she's certainly larger. Because she's almost thoroughly filling her space, her movements are increasingly harder to miss. Thus, at six months, the pregnancy is now evident to all. Especially me!

It's more than just my belly looking like it's housing a child as opposed to a lot of burgers and fries. (Make no mistake, though: these items are in there as well.) It's that the kid is very much making her presence known. When she kicks, it often tickles, and I can only describe the sensation as my stomach burping. Yeah, I know. Sometimes I can feel her dragging a body part (an arm? a leg? her gargantuan cranium?) across the inside of the womb. It's pretty cool, but if I think about it too much, it becomes a little creepy. There's someone IN there!

What's more, that someone's first favourite band is Green Day. Yep, Green Day, and modern-day Green Day at that. While the band played "Know Your Enemy" on live television, the kid sprung into action, kicking steadily and clearly responding to external sound for the first time. (Well, it was the first time I noticed, anyway.) She either loves Green Day or wanted us to turn the volume down. Who can say?

The next morning we decided to test her taste, flipping through satellite radio channels, waiting for a sign. She was selective and reminiscent of countless college students in the 1990s, thumping her approval of Harvey Danger's "Flagpole Sitta", "Mickey's Monkey" by The Miracles, and a cover of "You've Really Got a Hold On Me" by The Beatles. The song she loved most of all, however -- especially the beautifully thick drum parts -- was The Sonics' "Have Love, Will Travel". Ah, but she is her father's daughter, after all!


See also:
Metro Central Ultrasound
her previous portrait
gargantuan cranium
Green Day
"Know Your Enemy"
satellite radio channels
Harvey Danger
"Mickey's Monkey"
The Miracles
"You've Really Got a Hold on Me"
The Beatles
The Sonics
"Have Love, Will Travel"
her father

No. 7: No snips, nor snails, nor puppy-dogs' tails.

When: April 28, 2009
Where: St Michael's Hospital, Women's Health Centre, Obstetric Clinic
Who: Our developing daughter
What: Patrick's fear of raising a girl, soon to be realized

Why: Further chronicling of the sprout who grew into a peanut who grew into a stubborn little melonhead. The ultrasound technician joked that our baby is "squirmy" and "a bit uncooperative", as when we first checked in on her this morning she was lying on her stomach, arms above her head and obscuring her face, moving about as if trying to swim. Even the sugary stimulants in a banana, eaten while walking around the hospital in an attempt to jostle her onto her back, couldn't provoke our baby into flipping over. A compromise was reached as she lay on her left side and I on my right, with the technician meeting everyone halfway in order to finish the measurements.

Wow, I just caught a mental glimpse of our daughter's teenage years.


See also:
[S]nips [...] snails [...] puppy-dogs' tails
St Michael's Hospital
Women's Health Centre, Obstetric Clinic
Patrick
the sprout who grew into a peanut
ultrasound
teenage years

No. 6: The first of the inevitable many.

When: April 5, 2009, 7:20am MT
Where: Our bathroom at Pat & Hack's house, Cedar Crest, NM
Who: Me
What: Excited about my first grey hair!

Why: I'm not sure why I thought I'd only start going grey in my forties, and I don't know how quickly I'll sprout additional greys, but I like this change. Hack told me to blame it on the baby, who may or may not turn out to be the cause of my future greys. Of course, I might not like it as much if my grey hair arrives in patches instead of classy streaks. Also, maybe those classy streaks would look better in long hair than my preferred short. What if I wake up and find that I've gone completely grey overnight? A fright!


See also:
MT
Cedar Crest, NM
the baby
classy streaks
completely grey overnight
A fright! (Who is that? Click here!)

No. 5: If you got the money, honey...

When: Since February 2, 2009
Where: The Duffonomics blog
Who: Duff McKagan (no, seriously)
What: Articulately explaining financial matters in easily understandable terms

Why: Duff was always my favourite member of Guns N' Roses (hey, he was the bassist), but the simple yet informative Duffonomics makes me love him even more. Sure, this post isn't baby-related and I'm not the first to sing the praises of Duffonomics, but I felt compelled to profess my adoration after reading Duff's eighth and latest installment of his new blog. (Okay, it's really the ninth installment, but the fourth was just links to new Duff music and not posted by Duff himself, so I don't know if it counts.) Also, I can't believe I'm technically reading Playboy at work.


See also:
If you got the money, honey...
Duffonomics (accompanying ads are possibly NSFW, though the column itself is safe)
Duff McKagan
Guns N' Roses
the fourth was just links to new Duff music (again, possibly NSFW)
Playboy
NSFW (ironically, or perhaps fittingly, this link is SFW)

No. 4: All Change!

When: March 3, 2009
Where: Metro Central Ultrasound
Who: Fleming spawn! Virgo in the making!
What: Posing nicely for A Portrait of the Fetus as a Young Peanut

Why: Because there is no such thing as oversharing in Blog World, am I right? Also, the meaning of The Memory Aid has now evolved from "random things I may need to remember as I grow old" to "the chronicling of a sprout who will no doubt be thoroughly embarrassed that his or her development was posted online for all to see" (forever and ever! Bwahahahaha).


See also:
Metro Central Ultrasound
A Portrait of the Fetus as a Young Peanut